AAAHHHH!!! Closet Monsters!

Close your closet doors at night boys and girls!! The Closet Monsters are at it again. No, seriously, I'm not kidding. They come out at night from your closet and during the day they feed on your clothes and like moths burrowing holes in them. How do I know they exist? Well just ask my one time worn shirt and how the heck it got a hole in it the size of Mars!?! Closet Monsters I say! Creepy scary things lurk in the closet. Things, creatures that steal your red shirts and disappear your tan capri pants. They must have a pact with the Goodwill or something. And the hangers? What do they do with the hangers? They overlap the hangers in the closet and stick them inside each other so that when you want one shirt you get 3 and 4 fall on the floor. And one of them...because there are several kinds of Closet Monsters...comes in and makes a shoelace longer than the other one. One night all the sweaters on the top shelf looked like the Tower of Pisa. Apparently they are artistic suckers.

Now, I know you don't belive me, but they are there...lurking...in the closet.

Just ask the Clothes Dryer Sock Eater Monster.*

*but we named him Ralph